How to Watch Regionals at Work - Ninja Edition

As much as we all love roller derby, we grudgingly have to admit that eating and paying rent are just barely more important. That's why as much as we all want to be watching every minute of every bout during the WFTDA regionals, we will spend every Friday being the best worker bees we can, focusing on our work and being thankful to have a fulfilling job working for such an attractive and successful boss. Yup that's all we do. No reason to read any further because that report you asked for will be on your desk any minute now just like you asked for.  Love ya like one of my family, boss old buddy.

Here's to you!  You can go back to your office now.

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Alright screw that, here's the deal. Every one of us who works someplace with an internet connection is going spend as much time watching the Friday bouts on Derby News Network as we can without getting fired.  So here's a way to maximize your boutwatching time and minimize your chances of getting busted by that snaggle-toothed old fart who signs your paychecks.

It all comes down to camouflage, people.  If you plan ahead, you can easily set him/her up to fail to notice the browser window showing the bout.  First thing in the morning, fill your screen with word processors and important-looking spreadsheets.  Launch a music player with some sort of moving visualization window and softly play music all morning with that visualizer showing in one of the bottom corners of the screen like so:

No need to to look here, just playing some harmless music to help me work harder...

Make a point of getting the boss's attention at least twice for some work-related issue so they hear the soft music and see the moving thing in the corner that is clearly not distracting you from work in any way.  Then later in the day when the first bout starts, you minimize that music player but leave it playing.  Now open the DNN boutcast in a pop-out window, shrink it to the size of the music player window, turn down the bout audio and put it right in that corner where the music player was.  Presto, camouflage!  When the boss walks by later and hears soft music, he/she will expect something to be moving in that bottom corner so the video stream won't attract their attention.  Make some convincing tippy-tap noises on your keyboard every so often to complete the illusion and you're home free for the rest of the day, or until the underdog team runs off a 16-pointer on the final jam to win by one and you involuntarily scream "F**K YEAH!" and do a rockstar slide down the aisle.

Like this, but in khakis.  And newly unemployed.

Got any additional stealth boutwatching tips?  Post 'em in the comments!

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