Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Crotch Rock-It's WFTDA Finals Wrapup

Today's wrapup of Day 3 of the WFTDA National Tournament is not late.  I mean, yes it could technically be considered late since an entire calendar day went by with no information whatsoever.  But let's be realistic here, we know what goes on after roller derby bouts and it goes double for roller derby tournaments.  Crotch ( I love calling him Crotch!) dutifully attended the post tournament afterparty but being the loyal correspondant that he is, he found a nearby computer and tried to promptly compose and submit his report.

That didn't work out so well.

But at last he has sobered up and found his pants and has sent in his post for day 3 of Declaration of Derby.  Thanks for all your help Crotch and remember, hair of the dog dude, hair of the dog.

Sorry this last one is late but I was a little hungover this morning.

Well folks, the tournament is over now, and I'm still in recovery mode from absorbing 12 amazing bouts and an afterparty in one weekend. That's a lot of derby! Big thanks go out to the Philly Rollergirls for putting on an incredible tournament. Everything was first class, and I'm guessing that attendance was somewhere north of 2000 fans.

Now, on to the Finals. The first bout pitted Denver against Rocky Mountain for 3rd place. This was a rematch from Western Regionals where Rocky edged out Denver. Today though, Rocky had to play without one of their stars, DeRanged, who earned her name yesterday by getting suspended after taking a swing at a Texas skater during a bout. Her absence was definitely felt, because Rocky never could get into a groove, and Denver was able to control the pack and the scoreboard the entire bout. They were up by 40 at halftime and cruised to a 151-103 victory. One notable event that I'm sure everyone has already heard about was the injury of Catholic Cruel Girl. She and the pack had been forced to a standstill by the Denver blockers (again!) so that their jammer could catch up. When the Denver jammer came into the pack at full speed, she was unable to avoid CCG and back blocked her so hard that she fell forward and slammed into the ground and didn't get up. The EMT's strapped her to a stretcher as a precaution, but luckily it turned out to be just a shoulder injury. This accident reinforces my opinion that frequently stopped or backwards moving packs make for bad (and potentially unsafe) derby, even if it is legal. Hits become much more severe when one player is stopped, because the relative speed differential is so much greater. It's simple physics. Anyway, I'll get off my soapbox now and congratulate Denver on their 3rd place finish. They do have a sense of humor at least. At the afterparty, I approached Denver's captain while she was dancing and jokingly asked her how come she didn't move as much on the track as she did on the dancefloor. I was half expecting a punch to the face but was instead rewarded with a laugh and a thumbs up.

The championship bout was Oly vs. Texas, which involved 60 minutes of fans yelling "Texas Texas kill kill kill!" and "Oly Oly Oly! Oy oy oy!". I enthusiastically participated in both chants. A few minutes into the bout I stopped cheering for just Texas and started cheering for anyone who made a good play, and there were many of them from both teams. Yet this bout played out similarly to the Oly/Gotham bout the night before. Texas couldn't find an answer for Oly's impressive combination of speed, agility, and strength, so Oly was in the lead for just about the entire bout. 95-40 at halftime and 178-100 at the end. I'm actually a little relieved that they did win, since I went out on a limb and called them the new Gotham in my previous blog. I'd have felt a little foolish if they'd lost after saying that.

However, Texas aquitted themselves well later on that night by convincingly winning the afterparty.

One more note. I gotta mention that the West has definitely become the top region in all derbydom by finishing 1, 3, and 4 in the tourney. They've set the bar high for next season, and I can't wait to see the other three regions try to top it. Peace, love, and derby y'all!!!

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